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Why Am I So Angry?

Anger can come from any number of reasons that vary from person to person. However, anger is most commonly the result of a problem that needs to be addressed.

“A leading cause of anger is a person’s environment. Stress, financial issues, abuse, poor social or familial situations, and overwhelming requirements on your time and energy can all contribute to the formation of anger… 

Genetics and your body’s ability to deal with certain chemicals and hormones also play a role in how you deal with anger; if your brain doesn’t react normally to serotonin, you might find it more difficult to manage your emotions.” -Anger Symptoms, Causes and Effects – PsychGuides.com

With so many different triggers for anger, no one in their right mind can say that they know all of the causes for anger and how to address them all.

That being said, there are many causes for anger that the wide majority of people share like absolutely hating traffic or hating to wait in line for 2 hours. Some other common causes for anger that are:

  1. Feeling humiliated
  2. Feeling overwhelmed
  3. Feeling tired

Aside from the different causes of anger, there are also many different reactions to it. Some people cry when they’re angry (commonly known as angry tears) while others might want to just rant to someone they love.

Is there a way to measure my anger? Maybe I have an anger disorder

There can be many symptoms that people with diagnosed anger disorders have that you may feel you also have. However, this doesn’t directly mean that you have an anger disorder.

In the world of statistics, there’s a saying that goes “correlation does not equal causation.“ Essentially this means that while some streams of data or, in our case, symptoms, may overlap and look like there’s a direct cause and effect relationship, that isn’t always the case.

For example, just because you’re irritable when you’re angry, a common symptom for anger disorders like IED, doesn’t automatically mean you have an anger disorder. I don’t know a single person who isn’t irritable when they’re angry, do you?

Could my anger be something else?

It’s possible that what you’re feeling isn’t entirely anger. 

“Maybe it’s depression. “There seems to be a misunderstanding that depression is crying all of the time and not getting out of bed.” However, increased irritability is a common symptom, Hanks said.

Maybe it’s anxiety. “Individuals with high anxiety often feel on the verge of overwhelm because they have to work so hard to manage their own internal emotional state.” So when a challenging situation arises, you might be maxed out, which manifests as anger or a short fuse, she said.

Psychotherapist Rebecca Wong, LCSW, sees many individuals and couples who are angry because of relational issues. That is, they’re angry with their spouse, kids, parents, friends or coworkers. For instance, maybe they’re angry because they feel invisible or like they don’t matter, said Wong, founder of connectfulness counseling.

Maybe you expected your best friend to support you, but they didn’t. Maybe you expected your spouse to help out more around the house. “That’s where, if those buttons are pushed enough, often enough, you could flip into a state of anger without even knowing why.”” -Angry All the Time for No Reason? This Might Be WhyMargarita Tartakovsky, M.S. | PsychCentral

Can I really change?

It’s definitely possible for even the worst people to change. But, not everyone will. Only the people who make the conscious decision to change themselves and ultimately act on that thought will.

If you’ve read this far, we expect that you’re one of the people who will change for the better. For that, you have our support.

It will take a lot of time and patience but you can definitely do it.

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